I’m thrilled to share that my book The Promise Kept is now available in French! This milestone represents more than just a language shift—it’s an opportunity to connect with new readers, spark fresh conversations, and offer this story to a broader audience.
From the original inspiration to the final punctuation, every word has been thoughtfully rendered to retain the heart of the message while resonating with francophone readers.
Curious, I emailed Ramona Petrella Cummings, Founder and Executive Director of P.H.F.T.C.Inc. and asked her to tell me some things about her charity. This is her reply;
I moved to România în 2003 for a six month tour, working under a non profit organization in their private orphanage. During my time there, I was introduced to the local pediatric hospital where social babies who were either orphaned or abandoned were warehoused. I was told I could do anything I wanted to with the babies , but the hospital had nothing to aid with their care for me to use. No soap, no disposable diapers, wipes, creams, formula etc. I wrote home and asked my supporters for funds to buy these basic baby essentials and $750 came in. I started buying supplies and with the help of two friends we bathed, lotioned, changed, fed, and loved on these little ones. Many screamed at human touch or at bath time or just being lifted out of their cribs. It wasn’t initially very peaceful or happy, but after several weeks we started to see a difference. After returning home, I decided to keep trying to raise money for this cause and that found me returning every 6 months to work with the babies and buy supplies for the hospital. Soon, other people and foundations started helping in the hospital and I partnered with them by giving them supplies to work with. I turned my ministry into a non for profit about 9 years ago or so.
Social babies are what the children are sometimes referred to when they are in and out of government care, abandoned, and require social services’ help.
Initially, the abandonment was caused by extreme poverty, lack of jobs for women, Italian men fathering the children and abandoning responsibilities after finding out their girlfriend was pregnant. Mainly, it was due to it being ingrained in the Romanians heads that the communist government took care of things like this. Ceaucescu the dictator, forced people to have children and if they couldn’t care for them they were to put them in institutions for the government to “help” raise. It just became a way of life. The Roma population and their culture also adds to the abandonment issue, with young girls being married off at early ages and having children into poverty and ignorance of mothering. That is mostly the issue now as România is becoming more prosperous and the new generation isn’t ingrained in communism.
Ramona Petrella Cummings, Founder and Executive Director, P.H.F.T.C.Inc.
P.H.F.T.C.Inc. collaborates with and assists several Romanian Foundations working with the Roma and abandoned children, one of which is; Forget Me Not Ministries Co-op. We heard from Rachel Ross, Executive Director, Forget Me Not Ministries Co-op. This is what Rachel said;
From what I remember from conversations with government social workers in the hospital when we would have 100 abandoned babies or so at a time…they would not classify them as abandoned or social babies as they were not legally “abandoned” as in their parents had not signed away their rights. So, that was one way that they could deny having an abandoned baby crisis or issue…technically…they were not abandoned…even though some had been there for quite some time. But that was back in the day.
The majority of the abandoned children are Roma (gypsy).
Yes, poverty is a main factor in the cause of the children being abandoned. Over 90% of the Roma face unemployment, so providing for their families can be quite difficult.
Also, I believe it is a mentality that is left over from communist times as well, when families were encouraged to leave their children with the government and were taxed on having fewer than 5 children. Many Roma families that we have worked with do not consider that they have “abandoned” their child when they leave them in the hospital and are almost offended when I suggest that. They often think of it as receiving help for a few years with their child until they are in a better financial position.
The only real government assistance I know of is the children’s allowance which parents receive monthly. 718 lei for children up to two years old and 291 lei for children between two and eighteen years old. 718 lei converts to $156.00 U.S and 291 lei converts to $63.00 U.S.
I do not know of any extra assistance for single mothers, only extra allowance if your child has special needs.
I can say that I cannot think of too many moms at all that are single in the Roma community at least. In their community, it would be incredibly unsafe to stay single and oftentimes they will subject themselves to any kind of relationship, healthy/safe or not, in order to have someone to provide for them and protect them.
Rachel Ross Executive Director Forget Me Not MinistriesRomaniafmnministries.org
Photo credit; With permission to use from Ramona Cummings facebook page. Have a look at their facebook page, which will also direct you to their website.
By Adele Rickerby
The tragedy of Romanian mother’s abandoning their babies.
According to data published on the website of the National Authority for the Protection of Children’s Rights and Adoption, (A.N.D.P.C.A.) two hundred and seventy six babies were abandoned by their mother’s in Maternity hospitals and other health facilities in the first nine months of 2022. Forty-eight less than the similar period in 2021. Of these, two hundred and twenty were left in Maternity wards, fifty-four in Pediatric wards, and two were left in another hospital ward. One hundred and three were returned to their families, two were placed with the extended family, fifteen with families/individuals and one hundred and thirty-four were placed with foster parents.
According to U.N.I.C.E.F Romania, (the United Nations Children’s Fund), one in ten pregnancies in Romania are teenage mothers and that poverty is one of a number of risk factors.
The following reports, Authored by; Andrea Neculau, Diana Negut, Mihai Vacaru and Cristina Vladu states that ”Teenage pregnancy in Romania is a complex social phenomenon”.
Save the Children Romania reports that forty-five percent of the births registered among girls under the age of fifteen in the European Union, of which there are twenty-seven countries, are in Romania. This number is the highest in the European Union. Romania also ranks highest in the E.U. in terms of infant mortality, the main cause being premature births.
In collaboration with the O.M.V. Petrom Foundation, Save the Children Romania have launched the ”Baby Box” program, which aims to reduce infant mortality and support families immediately after birth.
https://www.salvaticopiii.ro/ce-facem/Sanatate/Cutia-bebelusului
According to statistics from the A.N.D.P.C.A. Website, the number of babies abandoned from January to December 2020, was four hundred and thirty-one. The numbers for 2023 are significantly lower.
You can find official statistics at the following link https://copii.gov.ro/1/date-statistice-copii-si-adoptii/ at category „Copii Părăsiti în Unitățile Sanitare”.
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Adele Rickerby
From New Zealand to Australia, from Australia to Romania, this is one incredible story of finding your children.
Words by Jessica Kramer, Editor @Ruth Magazine. Summer 2021 Edition.
In these days of social media, support and community groups for adoptive parents are going strong. As little as ten-fifteen years ago, unless you happened to have a friend already who was also going through the adoption process, it was much harder to find other parents going through the same circumstances.
Now, however, is a completely different story-and it’s thanks to these strong on-line communities that the term ”the child of your heart”, has been coined. Adele Rickerby, author of ”The Promise I Kept”, explains the term with visible feeling; a biological child is born of your body, but an adopted child is born of your heart. It was a long journey that united Adele with the child of her heart in Romania thirty years ago, and was the catalyst for writing her memoir. ”I kept a diary when I was in Romania, and I wanted to keep the historical context, the family of origin context. I would wake up in the morning with whole sentences in my head and the pressure would get so great that I would have to write them down,” she explains.
While many people have a rosy picture of adoption, Adele and Loredana’s journey was far from easy. Adele had travelled halfway around the world to Romania, alone in an impoverished country recently torn apart by the revolution, confronted with the living conditions of families and of children abandoned in overflowing, understaffed orphanages. It was there she found a baby, Loredana, who had been in the orphanage since she was a week old, writing in The Promise I Kept, that the infants gaze seemed to say, ”Finally you have arrived. I have been expecting you, waiting for you”.
The voyage wasn’t over then, however, with the adoption needing to be legalized through the Romanian justice system before Adele flew back to New Zealand for the final adoption papers before arriving home in Australia. Because of the nature of International adoptions at the time, and the ill-timed news breaking about illegal adoptions from Romania shortly after Adele returned home with her daughter, she faced rumors about the nature of Loredana’s adoption and wanted to set the record straight. ”I felt I needed to write the book to respond to criticism that I had done an illegal adoption or had “bought” Loredana from her birth mother, Adele says. “Health issues forced me to retire early, but also gave me the opportunity to write my memoir.”
The Promise I Kept was originally published in 2013, but a recent reprint has seen it regain popularity once again. “I regretted not putting photos in the original version of the book, and I had seen iconic photojournalist Tom Szalay’s photos in journals and magazines. He collated photos of Romania for me and I added some personal ones.” It wasn’t an easy book to write, but Adele describes the process as therapeutic all the same. “It was hard to write the first time, hard to write the second time. But it was like when I was in Romania and had to get on the train alone- it didn’t feel like I was being brave at the time; I didn’t really think about it. There was this real sense of urgency so I just did it.” She says.
The Promise I Kept 2020 Revised Edition is available on Amazon as a paperback or kindle.
This film depicts an authentic journey of the heart.
A very brave woman searches for answers as she seeks to uncover the truth about her adoption from Romania and to find her birth family.
Following the Romanian Revolution of 1989, Western media uncovered approximately one hundred thousand abandoned children living in institutions where death, disease and abuse were the norm.
Parents from countries such as England, Ireland, America, Canada, Germany, Australia and New Zealand, travelled to Romania to adopt these children in the hope of giving them a better life.
In the early 1990’s, there were estimates of approximately 1,000 children a week being adopted internationally.
Many of these children were not orphans but were abandoned by their parents due to poverty.
The surge in International Adoptions led to widespread unethical practices, corruption and human trafficking.
In response, the Romanian government implemented stricter adoption laws and regulations and subsequently introduced a ban on International Adoptions in 2001.
This ban was lifted in 2005, but the process of International Adoption from Romania is long and complex and restricted to couples where one of the couple is Romanian or single women who are Romanian.
Link to watch the story below:
Promise I Kept 6×9 text_21.09.20(updated)
#love #family #amwriting
Newly updated for 2020, This revised and updated book documents Adele’s experiences with her daughter since the book was first published in 2013, and Adele’s ongoing involvement in highlighting the plight of Orphans in Romania. In 1991, unable to have a second child because of a medical problem and struggling to cope in a failing marriage, New Zealander, Adele Rickerby, decided to take her future in her hands by adopting a child from Romania. The misguided policies of the recently deposed Ceausescu government on family planning had led to the birth of an estimated 100,000 unwanted babies in that country. The Promise I Kept is Adele’s story of her nightmare journey halfway around the world to find and adopt a baby, to negotiate her way through the barriers created by red-tape and corrupt officialdom, and finally to carry her tiny new daughter safely home to a life where she could be properly loved and cared for.
Toni Tingle, Mereo Books, an imprint of Memoirs Publishing, Gloucestershire, U.K
Orphan advocacy and child welfare in Romania; Community facebook page; thepromisekept.co
A heartfelt autobiographical work, The Promise I Kept chronicles the journey to adopting a child from post cold-war Romania. With incredible honesty, Adele shares her lifetime with Endometriosis and the resulting surgeries, her amazing first daughter, Melannie and the desire for Melannie to have a sister- leading to the decision to adopt and a difficult trip to Romania to meet baby Natasha and bring her home. It is a book that is equal parts relatable and eye-opening, at times confronting, but ultimately showcases a woman’s incredible determination and love for her child.
Review; RUTH Magazine @RUTHmagazineAustralia · Magazine
Copies are available to borrow or purchase from the following sites;
Dunedin Public Library, New Zealand, Heritage Room Collection.
Brisbane City Council Libraries
South Australian Libraries
Trove, National Library of Australia; https://trove.nla.gov.au/
Amazon, paperback, or kindle edition.
Please also see the link above to the pdf (text only) of the 2020 Revised Edition.
This is what happened in Romania when Abortion was banned.
Photo of an abandoned child in a cot in the Institute for the Unsalvageables located in Sighetu Marmatiei, a town in Transylvania at Romania’s Northern border with Ukraine. 1992. Copyright, Thomas B. Szalay photography.
On the first of October, 1966, Nicolae Ceausescu enacted Decree 770, which caused untold suffering for the women and children of Romania.
Decree 770 declared abortion and contraception illegal, except for women over forty-five, women who had already borne four children ( later raised to five), women whose lives would be in danger if their pregnancy were to go full-term, and women who had conceived through rape or incest.
In 1966, the population of Romania was approximately nineteen million. With decree 770, Ceausescu’s aim was to increase the population to thirty million by the year 2,000, in the belief that population growth would lead to economic growth. By 1976, the population had increased to approximately twenty-one million. An increase of about two million or twelve percent.
Women of child-bearing age were subjected to monthly gynaecological examinations to monitor a pregnancy or ensure that an illegal abortion was not carried out.
There was a monthly tax on childless people twenty-five years and over, married or not.
Any doctor convicted of performing an illegal abortion faced a jail term of between ten to twenty years. Despite this, illegal backyard abortions took place, sometimes resulting in sterility, infections and even death.
During these dark days of Communism, thousands of babies were abandoned by their impoverished parents into State-run institutions. After Ceausescu and his wife, Elena were executed by firing squad on Christmas Day, 1989, journalists from around the world descended on Romania and discovered the horror of these institutions. Approximately one-hundred thousand children had been abandoned in these institutions, where children were malnourished, neglected and physically and sexually abused.
Children born during this time were called ”Decretei”, children of the Decree. Decretei comes from the Romanian word ”Decree” meaning ”Decree”.
Empty shop shelves and queues for food were common during Communist era Romania. Lack of food meant malnourished mothers gave birth to premature and underweight babies. Hospitals fed these babies intravenously with unscreened blood. Hypodermic needles were in short supply and used over and over again without proper sterilisation. As a result of which more than ten thousand babies were infected with H.I.V causing an epidemic of A.I.D.S.
Once a baby or child had been abandoned into a hospital or institution, it was uncommon for biological parents to visit on a regular basis or to take their child back home.
thepromisekept.co is my facebook page where I share posts to the global community about Non Government Organizations working on social justice issues such as; child abandonment, poverty, education, and human trafficking.
https://www.magcloud.com/browse/magazine/1072551
This memoir, by photojournalist, Thomas B. Szalay, reflects on his journey into the lives of Izidor Ruckel and other abandoned Romanian children.
”Even the sparrow has found a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may have her young-
a place near your altar, Lord Almighty, my King and my God.
Psalm 84;3
Born to defeat; the incredible life story of the young man raised at the orphanage and who now provided a warm meal for the homeless of Bucharest.
Story by Ramona Raduly. https://life.ro Stories to Inspire. Society and Culture.
Gabriel Ciubotaru was born the day after the devastating earthquake of 1977. He opened his eyes to the world for the first time in a near ruined Bucharest, and this was to predict his destiny. His mother was an artist, the father an airline pilot. His father died in an airplane crash. When he was just ten years old, his mother also died from the rottenest of the Communist regime; she had been diagnosed with an extra-uterine pregnancy that had to be aborted, but for this, a commission was needed and abortions were not allowed at that time. Until the answer came, his mother died, and after this second great tragedy, Gabriel was taken to the ”Children’s Home”.
His years of school and adolescence were sprinkled with everything, and good and bad, but he grew up, learned, finished College and a Master’s degree and now helps the little ones. He founded the Association; ”Your Chance” with which he carries out many good deeds projects, but the dearest of his soul is ”A Warm Chance”, with which, for more than eight years, he provides a warm meal to the homeless of Bucharest.
An incredible story. A true story that could one day come to the page of the book ”Born to Defeat”.
”What does a day in your life look like today?”
”First of all, I don’t think that there are any significant differences between my program and those of other people, more or less ”N.G.O’s. This list probably sounds familiar to you; sleep, healthy eating, family, career, sports, reading, writing, travel etc. What is different from what I did five years ago is definitely a much better organisation, which helps me to better distribute the twenty-four hours of my life.
The sun shines above my house, I start my day with optimism, I carry out all the procedures I do in the morning, after which I eat and start work; I answer emails, I read correspondence, I answer telephones, counselling, conferences, meetings with collaborators, etc.and we solve the cases that come or are being finalised, I visit the social centres, I go to get donations from where people want to donate. Depending on the day, we prepare various projects, but the evening comes quickly over us. And because the summer is much longer, I have time to walk on the forest path, to relax and to think about my life.
I still visit the beneficiaries; for example today I was with a father and four of his ten children to see their mother in a penitentiary. I also read Ionut Ursu, the young man raised in an orphanage who has been volunteering in Nepal for five years. How did a child who, until he was eighteen, was told that he would die of A.I.D.S to build the first dental practice in Nepal?
”What are your current projects?”
A Warm Chance, Smile From the Box, Camp of Your Life, Requirements for Your Future, Helmut Schlotterer Social Centre.
”What is the dearest, closest project to your soul so far?”
The project ”A Hot Chance”.
”When you were a child, what did you dream of doing?”
My dream was to be a driver for salvation, to save people, but with the time and experience gained, I could say that I fulfilled this dream to help people. I didn’t think then that I could do so many things. Now I want to be a man to help people and to fill my parental void- the lack of a family, helping those in need. If you are not well anchored in your values, you may be living the dream of someone else, (society, parents, friends, boss.)
”What happened to you at the orphanage?”
After my mother’s death, I went to the orphanage called St. Stephens Children’s House. It has now been abolished. There were one-hundred children, each with his life story. Relatives took me there. They probably couldn’t afford to keep me. I was in school, in fourth grade in Sector One when my mother died. At the orphanage, we tried to organise the birthdays of my colleagues every month. We went to camps, we also had difficulties with the biggest ones who beat us. The desert was a luxury for us, fearing that the bigger ones will take it. But I was running from the placement centre and going to hospitals, and the doctors were protecting me and I was admitted for a few days. When I returned, they didn’t take much notice of me, because I told the Director and I was running away.
I learned a job, I finished school, we had good educators who helped us with lessons, they were beautiful memories. When the holidays came, then I was suffering, because most were leaving to go home and nobody came for me. I kept wondering if, as far as this big world was concerned, there would be no family for me. I was crying and calling out to God.
The Revolution came, the foreigners came with help and I started to grow. To grow old and to forget about the lack of family. We changed the room with furniture from donations, we dressed differently, we received oranges, we made juice. We slept six-eight children in a room. There is a lot to tell and I have not yet found anyone to help me finish my book ”Born to Defeat”.
I was organising trips. I remember that I went to a Children’s Centre in Busteni where there were three hundred children. I talked to them and it was an exchange of experiences.
”How were your school and teen years?”
The years of school and high school are unforgettable; full of joy, smiles, ears, emotions, years when I was part of a great and wonderful family. I remember with fondness the first day of school when, full of emotion, I went to class together with the teacher, a second mother to me, full of warmth and kindness, who loved us enormously and did everything she could to help us. She was the one who showed us, for the first time, with great patience, the magical powers of the pen, and the one who helped us choose the best path in any challenge we had. Even though I was in the more energetic group and I was upset about the lady teacher, she always had the power to understand us and to forgive us very easily. The day I finished fourth grade was full of strong emotions, both happiness because I was starting a new chapter in our lives, and sadness due to the separation from the lady teacher. I remember how many hugs, flowers and tears there were.
For me , the hardest stage in my life was in grades V-V111 and in High school when I felt alone in the world. But I learnt, worked hard to get somewhere, despite the obstacles in life. Thus, with the beginning of 5th. grade, I embarked on a new adventure of my life. We were all scared and curious at the same time. The years of Highschool proved to be wonderful and I learnt a lot of new things. Each teacher took care to teach us both lessons related to the subject taught and life lessons. I remember with joy the wonderful teachers we had, with all the defining gestures, how to teach and make us easily understand what they want to teach us and all the passion they had, each of them for own matter. I was forced to change High school but I quickly made friends. The school was in the orphanages yard, and my bedroom was facing the school yard, a wonderful view; I could see when children were leaving or coming to the school, and when the yard was filled with children, I was motivated to learn and to move on.
In school, I connected with beautiful friends. We were surrounded by two different worlds- children from families and those from the placement centre. I was watching and seeing the differences. Even though the children in the families were poor, they were more educated, but we from the centre were happier because we lived permanently in the community.
But the nucleus of life forms in the family. I did not understand then that there is another world.
”Who trained you to become a man today?”
People come and go from your life. Many special people have passed through my life, but some people remain for the rest of my life in my heart and mind. Every person who goes out of your way puts a brick in your character. It is not one particular person who trained me, it is a labyrinth of people, from my mother, educators, teachers, my aunt, to new people who came into my life after I opened the ”Your Chance” Association. Several doors opened to me. I got in touch with another kind of people, more responsible, serious. Also, every thank you from an orphan child or a child from a poor family has given me hope to move forward, change destinies and train at the same time.
I can remember a few people; my wife Gabriela, my aunt and my niece, Casiana Fometescu, Carmen Stoica, Diana Milea, Andrei Stan, educators, Mrs Mihai, Physics teacher, Aikido coach, Mr Grigorescu.
”When did the idea of helping sprout in your mind?”
A psychologist told me that God has put in me a special seed, to help people, because not everyone can do this because it is difficult to work with people. I liked to help as a kid, even though I grew up in an orphanage. After ’89, I was a volunteer at various N.G.O’s, such as YCC Romania,(Love and Home for Children), UNICEF, Ovidiu Rom, Alinare Foundation, etc. I was involved in all kinds of projects, from building houses, painting and offering clothes and accessories to counselling etc.
”And why do you do that?”
I help because I feel good about what I do, it’s a lifestyle, a passion, like medicine or other specialities, it’s a calling. By doing good things for others, your self-esteem will increase and you will have the satisfaction that you have given, that you give people a chance to be more responsible and to value your help. When you help, you take the burden of the beneficiaries soul, but give it the power it needs to recover. You can be an example to others and try a state of joy and fulfilment. Because when we help, we can make amazing things happen by pushing those in need to be happy.
”What is your motivation?”
When I give, I feel happy, and especially when I see others happy. As I am connected to the needs of poor people, with those who want to help, I am glad that I can be a bridge between the poor and the helpers.
”Were there times when you cursed your fate? Or on the contrary, do you thank God for living and being healthy?”
I thank God for giving me this opportunity to move forward. It is not easy. There are all kinds of obstacles in life. I had moments when I was about to give up, but Heaven always lifted me up and gave me the power to move forward.
”What’s your biggest regret in life?”
My regret is that I didn’t have my parents near me to see how I grew up and be satisfied with myself. I can’t speak well in words, but I think life gives you a lemon and you have to make lemonade. I was pleased with what I had and my regret is that I am too open and exposed to less good people. I can make mistakes but I also learn something from it every time.
”What makes you happy?”
If you fail to make a lifestyle out of being happy, because happiness is from God. It activates according to your state and your involvement in helping others. Let me throw away all the useless things and keep only the essentials. To read and learn new things, not to upset anyone and see happy people.
”What does ”Your Chance” mean?”
The Association ”Your Chance” was born from a desire to give a chance to everyone in need. To be a chance for both the people who want to help and for those who receive. Why is ”Your Chance” the expression that gives you the power to move forward even if you are going through difficult times in your life? Because we all have a chance in life and it’s a pity to waste it and not use it to do good.
The Promise I Kept 